A Love Triangle

"Some mommas and daddies are loving in a straight line take forever to heart and take a long sweet ride. But some mommas and daddies, let their heart strings tear and tangle. And some of us get stuck, in a love triangle" -RaeLynn "Love Triangle"

Twenty three years ago my parents divorced. I was three years old. Now, being 26 I've grown accustomed to the change that impacted my life at such a young age. Although while I am use to it, I would be lying if I said it's any easier now than it was then.

Let me just start by saying, I don't blame my Mom and Dad for separating. They knew in their hearts it wasn't going to work. Therefore, they did what was best for them and went their separate ways. I was never mad about it, but I was hurt and confused for many years. All I really understood at the beginning was one weekend was Daddy's and the other was Mommy's. I would get dropped off and be so excited to see my Mom, but then I would look through the window and see my Dad leaving... My heart broke a little more each time. It just didn't seem right for me not to be with both of them. It didn't seem right that my family wasn't together.

From then on, I had doubles of holidays, birthdays, everything-- you name it. I had one at Mom's house and the other at my Dad's. (This did mean double the presents! haha) I'll always be so grateful my parents got along through this time and let me make my own decisions... They never pulled me in one direction or tried to convince me to go another. While I had the freedom to choose where I wanted to spend my time, it was still a difficult decision to make. They always left it up to me, but no matter what I chose I always felt bad for the other because I wanted to be with them too. I wished so many times to be two places at once. It was a tough time for me. I remember praying to God many nights asking for my parents to get back together. That day never came.

But other wonderful things did follow those nights of soft prayer... God knows what He's doing because I gained a greater family then I could have ever imagined.

My parents separation led so many incredible people into my life. As my parents remarried, I gained two more parents. How lucky can a girl get? They've both been there from the very beginning. They raised me, taught me right from wrong, and loved me unconditionally. I could never imagine my life without them. Not only did I gain two wonderful parents, but also grandparents! Then aunts, uncles, cousins, and family-friends. By the way-- (this tripled the presents haha) And after a few years of my Mom's new marriage, my first baby brother came along and then another! They gave me the greatest gift of being a big sister.

It's amazing how things turn out for the better.

It hasn't always been easy, but I can honestly say it isn't the worst thing that's happened to me because from their loss of love...

I gained so much more of it.

Today, it's still tough sometimes... My parents now live in two separate states. Therefore, my family is hundreds of miles away from each other. I still put a lot of pressure on myself when it comes to where I should spend my time. I love my parents and family so much, it's hard being in the middle. No matter what I do, I miss the other(s) and wish they were there.

As a child of divorced parents I am in a love triangle that will never break. I'm stuck in this place of being in between the two people I love with all my heart. My parents have both protected me, loved me, and raised me to be the person I am today. (Great job guys, I turned out awesome!) But in all seriousness, they are each the best parents I could ever ask for. Through all these years and the troubles they've had-- they always put me first. It was about me and my happiness ahead of their own. I am beyond thankful. They went through one of the hardest moments of their lives, but they were still able to live up to be the incredible parents who raised a daughter who loves them beyond measure.

I love you so much. Thanks for being the best Mommy and Daddy.

"Some mamas and daddies are loving in a straight line Take forever to hearten and take a long sweet ride But some mamas and daddies let their heartstrings tear and tangle Oh-oh And some mamas and daddies ran out of love in '94 And some mamas and daddies don't even talk no more And some mamas and daddies let their heartstrings tear and tangle And some of us get stuck and some of us grow up In a love triangle" -RaeLynn "Love Triangle"